Beans and Gloom

This morning I woke up early and was prepared for a good day a school, but when we started math, Ryan indicated he was going to be less than cooperative. So I thought I would give him some beans and different size bowls and let him play on a tablecloth close by. This was a novel idea and he was very interested - unfortunately, so were Aimee and Drew, so I was battling whining from them instead in very short order! When they were done with their work I made the mistake of letting them play with him, and very shortly thereafter Aimee was directing the play, which was frustrating the boys, and I was reminding her that it was supposed to just be fun preschool play, then Drew was throwing handfuls in the air, at which he was instantly removed from the cloth. But by this time Ryan was no longer interesting in quietly scooping and pouring, and was, instead, dumping bowfuls on the carpet in the living room. I had him pick them up, of course (this said to counter my mom's observation that he "gets away with alot" - well, he does, but not with everything!), but still, the activity that was supposed to help de-stress our morning definitely raised my stressed level, even though I made supreme efforts not to scold or fret. Next time, though, it will be a strictly preschool activity!
That was pretty boring, I know - but my really deep thoughts are rather gloomy this week. We lost for good the house that we put the offer on, and though I should just be thankful for the closed door, I am also having a hard time letting it go and trusting that something else will work out. It seemed so perfect, and we are beset with difficulties around any other option, of which there are actually none at the moment anyway. Ah...God is good, at any rate.