This morning I went to the library for an hour by myself - Dave had volunteered to keep all four children after our usual night-before-a-hunting-trip fight. :-) It was very peaceful, and I could actually think about what I was doing, as opposed to my state of mind when I have to take everyone. For some reason my boys, even as babies, find a quiet space absolutely irresistible - "Hey, listen how my voice can totally fill the room!" - and I have never been able to land on a fool-proof strategy for coping with a two-year-old who suddenly decides he's not leaving and drops to the floor half-way to the counter in very loud protest. If I am to avoid excessive noise or other unruly behavior, I have to be so strict and precise as I move through the library and get to the check-out counter, that my nerves are pretty much exhausted by the time I get home anyway. So it was refreshing to go by myself (even without the baby, no less!).
As soon as I arrived home, with a load of books (the librarian said today that after we come to the library and pick up all our holds, she feels like she's already fulfilled so much of their circulation goals for the day that she could go home!), Dave and Drew left for the hunting field near our house to go dove hunting. I had asked him earlier in the week if he really thought Drew would make it the whole day, and he was optimistic, but I was not the least surprised when an hour and a half later, they showed up again, accompanied by the son of a co-worker who had come up to hunt with them. ("Do you mind...?") So now the kids have someone to play with today, and I think it's going well enough so far. Drew in particular is thrilled to have a boy relatively close to his own age to play with, and indeed I think it will be good for him. He's been...especially energetic lately! He's so funny about it, though, because he always has a convoluted explanation for his behavior at any given time. Usually he insists that his mind just can't control what his body wants to do (like when he feels compelled to knock his brother down or shoot arrows in the house), and when we try to talk about self-control, he starts talking about the soldiers in his brain - the good ones, who (with little success so far) try to restrain the bad ones, who, judging from the pillaging of my house on a daily basis, are Huns. Of course as he's talking - and talking and talking - about this he's no longer hearing a word I'm saying, so I'm never sure if anything is getting through! This morning as we were all waking up, Aimee, who had been next to him on the pallet in our room, commented that one of the most annoying things was Drew grinding his teeth in his sleep. He hadn't said anything up to that point, so we didn't even know he was awake, when he suddenly began explaining that he grinds his teeth when he wants to dream, etc. etc. etc. Our Drew!
This week for Aimee has been interesting. Her day Thursday made me wonder again if the therapist was right about the psychological issue she suspected, and Friday started that way again. She began to get "stuck" on a certain subject and the intensity began to grow, and as this process, although different subject, had nearly driven everyone insane the previous day, I tried to help her redirect herself early. I suggested she make a room in her mind for all those related thoughts. I had her imagine herself walk out of the room and close the door, and I told her she could open it again that afternoon. It actually worked! She has still been intense, but more manageable. On Thursday she was eating, drinking, speaking, hearing, feeling, etc. that one thing, and nothing else seemed to be getting through. It's difficult to explain this sufficiently, and maybe it is just normal seven year-old girl behavior, but it certainly does seem a little over the edge sometimes. I'm not sure what direction we'll go in, though, whether or not we'll actually see the psychologist. I felt I instantly lost support as soon as I mentioned that part of what the therapist said. So we'll see!
3 comments:
Glad you enjoyed your trip to the library, we all need a chance to recharge once in a while!
Love the stories about Drew. :)
Wait a minute. He got to go out hunting all day and all you got was one hour? Hmmmm. And you babysat the other guys kid too? Hmmmm. I would be negotiating for a little more than an hour. Take an hour alone, then go get the baby and take two or three more!
Well, okay, so it's not very equitable most of the time. :-) We take steps in whatever size we can get them, however, but also, this is usually what the pre-hunting fight is all about! In addition, I had previously volunteered to keep both boys here if they weren't doing well on the fields. It's a dicey topic, though, and a "discussion" here that's been going on for eight years!
Post a Comment