Toothaches

At Aimee's soccer practice - with everyone in tow, as usual! - the Korean mom who has both a little girl on Aimee's team as well as a little boy on Drew's began talking with me as our boys played and we trailed our active toddlers. This was a nice change, because frankly, the other moms are rather clique-ish, and even if I wanted to try to force my way in, I have to spend all my time keeping little boys out of mischief instead. Last night, for instance, while I was enjoying having an actual conversation in between diverting Chase's attention from the soccer field (where he longs to play!) and playing basketball with Ryan (I am the "basket," so that he can dunk!), Ryan slipped away on a solo trek to visit the horses - not too far, but still farther than I would like a little one to travel alone. I found him happily chatting at a friendly horse who was endearingly poking his head under the fence. But I digress. In my conversation with the aforesaid mom, whose nationality I mention because it was interesting to hear her perspective on certain subjects. ("What is this 'homeschooling'? I think almost everyone in America homeschools..."), she asked me at one point if life was difficult with four children. I laughed. "Sometimes," I replied, and then she went on to say that one day she was complaining about how busy and tired she was (she has three children), when her husband said, "Haven't you seen that mom with four children? You should not be complaining!" So she said every time she thinks her life is hard, she thinks of me! Now, I don't think four is a very large number, neither do I think that moms should compare themselves to each other - C.S. Lewis said something very wise about "the toothache you have at this very minute" being "the worst pain in the world". It is, in short impossible to compare most situations, and every mother has her own unique set of joys and trials, but that being said, I still find myself looking at Courtney and her brood of seven, and thinking how I ought not to be such a wimp! Just before I met her, Courtney endured a year on her own, her husband in Cuba, with four children and one on the way. Pretty much all of our struggles pale in comparison, I have to admit! :-)

Happy Easter

Jesus is risen...He is risen, indeed!

That's the reality, of course, but as we were coming home last night from a flurry of Easter weekend visits to all our family in and around Rock Hill, Dave and I were both feeling a little jaded. "Let's be the boring ones, please," I sighed to Dave at one point, and he returned with smile, "Yeah, we can be the ones people have to ask about, rather than the ones they're talking about." I'm all for it! My family, hitherto regarded as pretty "normal" and stable (although admittedly, there were a slew of problems our members had to deal with privately over the years, for fear of disrupting that appearance of normal), is still being rocked by the tension and and unpleasantness of our parents' separation. And just when Dave's family was looking somewhat calm by comparison, his mom gave us warning before we arrived for Easter dinner that his sister and her husband are getting a divorce. While this was not necessarily shocking news, it wasn't something we were expecting, either, and we were less then pleased about having to have that discussion with the kids on the way to dinner - "By the way, guys, we just wanted to let you know that Uncle Rick won't be there this afternoon because he and Aunt Lisa aren't going to be married anymore..." It's becoming more difficult to reassure them about the future of their own parents, for certain.

We did have fairly good visits despite all that, although after collapsing in bed upon returning home and unloading sleeping children, we were glad it was all over!

Am I the Only One...

...to spend the entire grocery budget a good week and a half before the next payday? I'd like to think I can make it all last that long, but I know the truth.

...to lay down the law, then find myself actually unable to enforce it? I read Courney's great post about standing firm, but sometimes time itself just works against me, and that's frustrating. That post was encouraging, though, Courtney - thanks! It was a good reminder today at the library, when I stood my ground with one little three year-old who didn't take me very seriously at first.

...who gets nervous just thinking about going to the library, now that we're talking about it? Today's experience was okay, but even on this good outing, Ryan set off the alarm at the doors more than once - and seemed to take pleasure from doing it, of course.

...who LOVES her children, but can't wait for bedtime some days? :-) (Mothers of one don't comment - wait one or two more children, please!)

But do you know, I had a moment of weakness this afternoon and thought about number five. I pictured being pregnant - and then I remembered my last birth experience. In fact, my whole body remembered it, and I strengthened my resolve to wait until Chase is about three before considering another one. I celebrate my sister Sarah's new pregnancy, though, and will be praying for her already - her Isabelle will only be turning one this week!

Slumber party!

No, not here, although frequently there are children in sleeping bags on our floor...but tonight Aimee is enjoying a birthday sleep-over party at a friend's, and it sounds like it's going to be really fun (bowling tonight, Horton Hears a Who tomorrow morning). I admit, though, I feel nervous for her! She and her friend Claire used to sleep over at each other's houses when they were only three or four and somehow I didn't have any qualms about that, and I'm sure this party will be a blast (supervised by people I trust), but still, I wonder if I'll be awakened by a phone call in the middle of the night. I may just for the sake of it, anyway, as I gave Aimee our "extra" cell phone with permission to call us anytime she feels the need. :-) Will I feel better if she does call, or doesn't?

Tidbits

I was baking some cookies this afternoon when Aimee walked in and wanted to help. She began criss-crossing the peanut butter cookies with a fork, and after a minute I gently urged her to hurry a little (which looks bad in print, but there really was a good reason for it). "I'm doing my best, Mommy," she replied, "I'm just not accustomed to baking." How old are you? and in which century exactly were you born? :-)

Later, while the older ones were at Awanas, the little boys were having a blast together, mostly by making a mess just for the fun of it, and at one point I saw Chase carrying the backdoor mat - the one out of which can be shaken at least a gallon of sand (our backyard is full of it) at any given time. And yes, he was trailing all that sand behind him as he traipsed all over the living room! He dropped it and I went to get the broom; when I came back a second later, the rug was gone. To my query concerning it's whereabouts, Ryan said sweetly, "I put it up for you!"
"Oh, really - where?"
"On the table!"
Um...thanks, dear little man!

A little while later as Ryan was helping me put things back in order, I thanked him for his cheerful cooperation, and said "You're so..." pausing to let him fill in the adjective of his choice. "Smart!" he chimed in. We did it a few more times, and he offered, "awesome," "cool," and, finally, "three." So there's Ryan in his own words - smart, awesome, cool, and three. :-)

Drew is almost always good for a one-liner, but lately his vocabulary has been liberally sprinkled with five year-old boy language that is not so nice in print. Ah, well, there's still a brilliant, sensitive little mind under all that, and it's my opinion he's becoming especially good with numbers. He's breezing through 1st grade math - and actually knows most of Aimee's math facts as well - and he's constantly asking me all kinds of completely random math questions. The other day he asked me the sum of 71 an 71. I answered 142, and he thought about it for a second before offering, "So, 70 plus 70 is 140..." and a few seconds later, "...and 69 plus 69 is 138..." Today he started at the same peg, and went up, "If 71 and 71 are 142, then 72 and 72 is...144! And 74 and 74 is...148!" It may that I'm just extremely deficient in math skills, but I think that's pretty good for a kindergartner!

And Chase... He communicates so that I can understand him perfectly, of course, but he still doesn't talk much at this stage. Aimee was quite a talker at an early stage, and I was a little worried, admittedly, when her brothers were "behind" in the verbal department. Drew and Ryan have excellent vocabularies for their respective ages now, though, so I feel pretty relaxed about Chase's pace in that area. I do get excited when he articulates something well, however, and it seems that his latest word is "nanana," which he says pointedly at bananas (and any other fruit!). Okay, so that may be a little hard to distinguish from the other "na-na" words in his vocabulary, but I know what he's talking about!

For Hannah

I don't have a way to email you, and I didn't know where to put this on your own blog, so this post is all for you, Hannah! :-)

I suppose, in the first place, that was a misleading title a couple posts ago - I was tired and couldn't think of anything more creative. But how kind of you to anticipate missing me if I were gone! Funny how we weren't closer friends back in Greenville, while I think now we would be. The online connections are something, though, and I've really come to treasure your blog and your comments on mine, so our blogging friendship means a great deal to me. *sniff, sniff* :-)

Aimee did indeed do a great job with the pie-throwing, the only indications of her sensory issues ("issues" is such a less threatening word than "problems," isn't it!) being that she declined to smash the pie around in "Mr. Steve's" face, as her friends begged her to do, and she didn't stick around to exult over her victim, as she can't stand the sight of food on someone's face (which in this house full of boys she often eats in another room by herself). My, THAT was a mouthful! At any rate, had figured she would probably love doing it, and that the excitement over being the winner of the contest would overrule anything else.

Finally, I've been meaning to share this with you - back a few months ago, I was reading your blog when Dave walked by the computer and glanced at what I was doing. "Hey, I know her," he remarked. "That's...Hannah, right?" I said yes and complimented him on remembering something like that - this is, after all, the man who confuses Sandra Bullock and Julia Roberts, among other things! - and he began to chuckle a little. "Her son's name is Ian, right? Blond hair?" Yes on both counts, as I continued to be amazed he would remember this from several years ago, after only seeing you guys briefly on a couple occassions. "It was her husband, right, who came to our apartment in Greenville to get a diaper for Ian?" at which I burst out laughing at the memory myself. Apparently that was amusing enough to stand out vivdly in Dave's mind, while I had nearly forgotten it, but it was funny. Do you remember that incident? I can't remember enough of the details to explain it sufficiently to everyone else here, but I thought you might appreciate it. :-)

Dave is working this morning, and I've got to get everyone to church this morning by myself, so I guess I should start getting about that. It's not actually the getting everyone there that's the challenge; it's rather being there that presents the problems. We don't use the nursery for various reasons, and I believe firmly in letting each child determine his or her own readiness for independence. For both Aimee and Drew, this has worked beautifully, and they both now choose to go to Sunday School and Children's Church; social butterfly Aimee never had much separation anxiety in the first place, and Drew was glued to me until exactly two years old, when he suddenly decided he would like venture out every now and then. Now I have Ryan and Chase, and while I am prepared to walk the halls with Chase for some time still (Dave and I take turns at this, I must add), I confess I am beginning to doubt myself where it concerns Ryan's attachment. He adamantly refuses to attend any children's services, even with one or both of his siblings present, and he is too big (and loud) for me to take along with me in Sunday School (as I could Chase), as well as not very cooperative for very long in church (again, Chase is a little easier there, too). This means that two people are almost essential - one to quickly escort the little ones out when Ryan becomes too noisy, and one to sit with the older ones. When I'm by myself, things can get a little hairy, and I can't help wishing Ryan would be ready for that little bit of independence already!

Awana Grand Prix

The Awana Grand Prix last night was really fun! We didn't bring home any trophies, but both kids behaved admirably, cheering other cars on and smiling at the end of every race, though they were understandably dissapointed as we came home. They soon began talking about designs for next year, though, and all in all, I think it was a good experience. Here are some pictures.

The Batmobile and the Carrot

Aimee putting her car on the track

Waiting at the end of the track (Aimee is in the white hat; Drew is in the black shirt)

The highlight of the night for the Meesters: The Awana kids have been saving money since January for their Adopt-a-Club club in Amman, Jordan, and they made a dual contest. The kids put the money in jars with pictures of the Awana leaders, thereby voting for the leader who would receive a pie in the face at the Grand Prix. At the same time, the clubber who completed the most sections in that period of time would be the one to throw the pie. So here are pictures of Aimee throwing the pie!

Farewell

This morning I woke up to the sound of birds singing and dogs barking (in particular, the sound of our neighbor's dog barking furiously at the ground, as usual); conspicuously absent was the sound of our bantam rooster's lilting crow, for alas, Jack met a rather bizarre and inglorious end yesterday afternoon. I was at the store when Dave called me to tell me what had happened - what exactly happened I don't even want to detail here - and it required some effort not to begin crying in the middle of the dairy aisle. I was fond of that little rooster, after all! The kids shed a few tears, but were philosophical about it in the end - we've experienced the life and death cycle many times in our small menagerie. But he was a fine animal, a better watchdog at times than our actual dog, and a pleasant alarm clock, and we'll miss him. Farewell, Jack!

In happier news, the kids are very excited about the Awana Grand Prix tonight. Aimee's car is a carrot, and Drew's is the Batmobile (or his own variation, at any rate). We took them to the church building last night for a weigh-in and a run down the very cool track, and we're all now looking forward to the big event tonight. I don't know how they'll actually do in the competitions (for design as well as speed), as we didn't spend as much time on our cars as I'm sure many of the other kids did, but hopefully this will at least serve as practice in good sportsmanship, something in which I'm afraid my kids aren't very skilled yet. Aimee's constant pursuit of perfection leaves her sour and frustrated sometimes at missing the mark, and Drew's dislike of losing usually stems from having spent five and a half years so far trailing an older sibling who enjoys keeping him in his place. But I don't mean to be too hard my own children - I'm sure the concept of being a good loser doesn't come naturally to everyone. At any rate, I'll be sure to take pictures (the happy ones!) and post them this weekend.

Walking and Running (and One Tired Mama)

Last night we were all in the living room, the boys watching the race (did I really say that? I can't believe there are Nascar fans in my own house!) and I attempting to straighten things up before bedtime. At one point, I noticed a little boy standing on the couch with an exultant grin on his face, which in itself is far from unusual in this house, except that ths time when I saw it there was something not quite right...it took my brain a couple seconds to catch up, and when it did, I realized that it was Chase standing on the couch! Aghast, I scooped him and surveyed the scene - had climbed up and over the child-size armchair that had been pushed near the couch, and since both Dave and I were right there, he must have done it in a matter of seconds. Sure enough, when I put him down, he scaled the chair again, and climbed up onto the couch, perfectly delighted with himself. Dave chuckled, "You're in for it now," but in reality, Chase had already begun to contribute to the happy chaos here. He took his first steps at the end of January, and in a couple weeks was a very steady walker, but I didn't think his walking would really affect my daily routine much, since he it seemed he had already been able to get where he wanted crawling and cruising. I was, of course, quite wrong! The week he really hit his stride as a walker, I was exhausted trying to keep up with him - it was as if a whole new world had opened up to him, and he intended to explore every bit of it all day long. He also became more assertive and demonstrative, very much as if he realized he had been putting up with quite a bit of inequality and oppression from his siblings all this time - and didn't have to any longer. So while I have applauded his new skill, life has certainly become more challenging - I don't know when the house will ever be clean again, and school has become more difficult than ever. As to the former, I'll have to swallow my pride and supress my compulsions; as to the latter, I guess we'll just have to work on math skills another year! ;-)

Truthfully, though, it's not all Chase's fault we're having difficulty getting things done. Last week Dave started taking an electrical class at Midland's Tech on Tuesday and Thursday nights, and Aimee and Drew also began soccer at the YMCA. Drew's Wedneday night practice was manageable (even though Dave was working late and I still had all the kids there), but Aimee's Thursday night practice was something else indeed. In the first place, Thursday night was quite cold, and the practice was after dark, so the little ones were not entirely comfortable, and I was nervous watching the boys run off in different shadowy directions. We made it work for a time, but eventually they all croseed a threshhold of tolerance, and when I collected Aimee as soon as practice ended, it appeared she had crossed that threshhold as well. We marched back to the car, across three soccer fields and one street, with four crying children (the boys at the top of their lungs, no less!) and one numb mother determined to enlist some help for the next week. Game day on Saturday was hectic, too, but at least Dave was home to make it a more possible venture. He took Aimee and Ryan to the girls-only league game in downton Columbia (had I known they would be playing some games there, I might have insisted she play on the co-ed league), and I took Drew and Chase to the Y near our house. Neither of our teams won, but the kids, of course, had a terrific time, so I guess we'll make this soccer thing work - and try to be cheerful about it!