The Name

It is a fact that Gone With the Wind is one my favorite movies. I've loved it ever since I was just a little older than Aimee is now, and it used to be the movie of choice at my birthday sleepovers. So I probably will call my new daughter "Miss Scarlett" every now and then, and I don't think the Scarlett O'Hara quotes thrown our way (yes, I mean YOU, Sarah Elliot!) will ever bother me.

But while I admit this was all in the back of my mind when I began contemplating the name Scarlett, it isn't the reason we eventually chose it. It's funny how I had a list of favorite girl names I had been hanging onto for years, and yet I still searched through lists of baby names (and only ever girl names, even before an ultrasound confirmed what I think I knew from the start), not quite satisfied with any of those favorites. The little soul I was carrying was someone different than the potential daughters of the past - the daughters, incidentally, whose absence I didn't mourn. I had always wanted boys, and with some of the finest specimens have I been gifted. But this time, from the moment I suspected her presence, it was a girl, and it seemed just the right time for another one of that variety.

That said, from the time we announced that we were expecting her, there was an undeniable vibe that "another one" would only make sense for us if it were going to be a girl. Because for heaven's sake, five? We had better be having a girl, anyway, because we certainly didn't "need" another boy, even if we did insist on having another baby we didn't "need." I don't mean we got this from people who love us, but we certainly heard it from society in general. So as I began thinking about names, I knew we needed to give this baby a name that would forever speak against that vibe. Even when it was confirmed that she was a girl - and I almost hated giving nosy strangers the satisfaction of that knowledge when they rudely inquired, "You're having a girl, I hope?" - I wanted to let her know that she wasn't just "another one," a superfluous baby who was only good for being displayed in pink. I wanted her always to know that she will always be wanted and needed, a vital part of our family, whose very existence will give us more than the insignificant numbers it will cost us to raise her. (Ugh - I really loathe when the "cost" of raising children is expressed in monetary terms.)

So something struck me when I came across the name "Scarlett" one day. Of course it only refers to a shade of red, but I find red to be a vibrant, cheerful color, and I like to have at least some threads of it in each room. It makes me happy, and that's the thought that remained with me when I pondered that name, which I also found to be a pretty and unique one. Not everyone in the family was sold on it when I first suggested it, but it remained on the list, and they began to warm up to it. But when we first saw her on the ultrasound screen , suddenly there she was - Scarlett. It was just WHO she was. Dave apparently felt the same way, too, because while we hadn't said anything about it in the doctor's office, he sent me a text later that day and asked how Scarlett was doing. And that was that.

As for Jane, I can't even remember when that was first suggested, but it just seemed to fit, and when I put the names together, I could picture the spirited girl I imagined she would probably grow up to be. Oh yes, and then there's this relative we have who has the name Jane...who herself is a rather spirited and vibrant individual, so that was probably some of it, too. (But don't let it go to your head, Erica Jane, baby sister o' mine.) Jane, too, means, "God is gracious," and that fit with our theme as well. Very simply put, grace is getting things we don't deserve. We don't find our children to be trophies that fit into the neat decor of our own lives - because, among, other things, that would lend itself to suggest that too many of them, or too many of the wrong kind, would be...too many. And even worse, that the ones we have are ones we "deserve." We believe instead that God creates people for his own purpose, and so that our children don't ultimately belong to us anyway. But as usual with God's plans and purposes, He weaves the big picture and the small pictures together in a perfect tapestry. With our children, this means that they are gifts to us - gifts we don't deserve and therefore can't rightfully hoard, but ones we welcome, treasure, and protect.

So, in giving our new gift this name we are saying that you, Scarlett Jane, are more than a fifth child and a ninth grandchild. You are not one too many, more than we need, a slip-up, an extra, or a problem that we should have "fixed" before you were conceived. You are God's gift to us, an outpouring of his graciousness in our lives, and you are bringing to our family vibrance, color, and happiness - and we're so glad you're here!