A Note of Confidence

Here in Ohio, we are required to notifify the school district of our "intent to homeschool," and that intent must be approved by the school board. I hate this and think it is absurd that I, the parent, whose home provides the natural and normal learning environment, must request permission from the governement, whose schools can only offer a substitute for the real thing. But we generally try to follow the law, so we (somewhat grudgingly) go through the notification process, which, to our school district's credit, is quite painless. It is merely the principle of the thing to which I object. At any rate, part of the deal is that at the end of each school year, homeschool families must either submit standardized test scores for each student or a written narrative from a certified teacher, verifying that each student is performing at his or her ability. The latter is cheaper, so that was our choice this year, and we chose a teacher who is a part of our homeschool group, and, coincidentally, also goes to our church. Most importantly, she is a supporter of parents' rights, and wants to help homeschoolers fulfill the letter of the law, without infringing on those rights, and I appreciate that enormously.

So a few weeks ago, I organized the kids' portfolios and typed some reading lists, and took it all to the assesment, which was an informal meet-up with said teacher at a Panera. She took a quick glance at our curriculum summary and reading list, and said, "Wow - it looks like you've found your niche and are in your groove. It's great!" And we spent the time talking about homeschool  philosophy,learning styles, and the fact confidence in homeschooling comes from realizing that it is a lifestlye and as such, is an entirely different animal altogether than the experience in a brick-and-mortar school. And while I still strongly disagree with the fact that I had to do this whole thing at the governement's behest, I really did appreciate the confirmation that what we're doing is not only passable, but is, in fact, a really good thing.

I say this all NOT to toot my own horn. Goodness knows we have our ups and downs, and there are times - times I've posted about here! - in which I feel like I'm just failing my children completely. But underneath it all, we know that our homeschooling journey is a good thing. It will work out. It IS working out. I credit my own experience growing up as a homeschooler with much of that confidence (so thanks, Mom and Dad). The rest of that confidence comes from having five children who are all very different people, and who are all learning and growing faster than I can possibly keep up with, and they've done so whether I've felt "on the ball" or have felt like we've done nothing at all. They're learning whether I've had money for all the curriculum I've wanted to buy (um...let me try to remember the year that happened...) or have barely scraped enough together to get the basics. They're learning NOT because we've tapped into just the right curriculum, NOT because I'm a great teacher or an especially patient person, and NOT because we're just the kind of people homeschooling is "for." Our assessor didn't say that we were "in our groove" because we have it all together and are doing this homeschooling thing perfectly. She said it because the one thing we do know without a doubt is that people are wired to learn, and when they have the freedom to do so, with as little interference as possible, they will...ah...do so!

That didn't come out as smoothly as I had intended. At any rate, we have all our paperwork in order, ready to send in with our notification this year, and, in addition, we have a little extra boost of confidence as we keep marching along in our journey of learning together. And I hope my fellow homeschool warriors will feel some of that same confidence! We can do this. We ARE doing this. Our kids are, at the same time, learning in spite of us AND because of us. So don't dwell on your fears, fret over your perceived shortcomings, or discount the "nothing" days in which your kids don't do a smidgen of "real school" but instead "just" read, play, and let their senses interact with God's creation.

 Also, take comfort in the fact that because I've expressed these high-flown ideals and exhortations, tomorrow is probably going to explode in the humbling, hair-tearing, lock-myself-in-the-closet-to-cry kind of day that typically happens just when you think thing are going pretty well. Ha! But even if it does, we'll still be learning...